After a month’s hiatus we’re back online, folks. Boneyards is back from the dead to rock your underworld just in time for Halloween. Only 3 shows left — 10/20, 11/2 and 11/3. Last night’s 10/17 show was the kickoff. Read on —
Something quite phenomenal happened at last night’s seance that closes every show. In short, a dead kid needs our help and I intend to help her. Will you join me? At first, our two Ouija volunteers Kathryn and Geoff (with verbal help from Questioner Karen and myself) got the planchette to tell us its initial, V, and that it was 2 years old. This has happened to me before but rarely; a child spirit that has been around for many, many years will take on a certain adultlike maturity even while remaining childlike in its answers and overall behavior. This was borne out as V, when answering a question, would point to the star shape on the Ouija board rather than spelling a complete word, just like any 2-year-old might. In a different context it might have been adorable. V did confirm that she was standing to my right (I held out my right hand and asked if she was near it or near my other hand), and that she was not alone. This didn’t surprise me as I already assumed that the 12 Synagogue Saints, as I call them, were in the room with us. But V told us that only 5 were present. I don’t know why, but I feel that V was a little girl although gender was never specifically discussed.
I crossed the room and fired up the P-SB7 spirit box.
Meanwhile at the Ouija board, the planchette moved to YES and stayed firmly planted; not just sitting there but refusing to move. If you’ve used a Ouija board a lot you know what I mean. We switched Ouija volunteers numerous times in an effort to “warm up” the board, like tuning in a radio, but the result was always the same. The planchette was firmly planted on YES. Prior to this, the planchette had also been moving extremely slowly and we cracked jokes that maybe it was an old woman who has visited us in a previous session. At that the spirit box called out “Lazy!” loud and clear across the room (see the full EVP video and transcript below).
But there is a larger picture unfolding here, readers. This kid, this perished toddler, V, is frightened and asking for our help. Some of the spirits around her are also asking us to help her. I’ll tell you what I plan to try in the upcoming show this Sunday, but first get the full picture–
As always the raw footage is 5 minutes long. I’ve cut it down to the most audible highlights. Every EVP has also been slowed down and amplified for your ease of listening. Watch the video, read my transcript with comments, and then see my plan at the end. The more of us involved in this otherworldly rescue mission on Sunday afternoon the better.
Stan the man. [Only my closest friends call me this, and it’s been one of my nicknames since elementary school. I have never had cause to use it in this space so the Synagogue Saints have picked up on this on their own. I’ll take it as a sign of well-earned affection.]
We’re beside you. [Cool. I’m used to this by now, this being my 8th seance in this space. Quite a narrative has unfolded here with the spirits who inhabit this building. I urge you to listen to them all to get the full picture.]
Help me. [This one threw me for a loop. We didn’t hear it live in the room last night. It only emerged during playback. I’m assuming it is the spirit of 2-year-old V.]
She’s at the store. [This building opened as a store in 1895. It became an Orthodox Jewish synagogue in 1909. Is there some kind of parallel universe happening here wherein some of the spirits still see their surroundings as the store and think they’re in it, whereas others see it as a synagogue?]
Have courage. [This is the 2nd time the spirit box has told us to “have courage.” What exactly does it mean in this present context? Is it talking to us or to frightened V? Because then we hear a baby crying…]
[Baby crying.] [My reaction to hearing this startling sound was, I’m helping this kid get outta there. And it’s as though the next responses are pushing me to give it a try … ]
Everything’ll work … Let’s go … Billions wait … Others … left the grave. [Chilling. I confess I could only think of the bridge of Blue Oyster Cult’s “Don’t Fear the Reaper” —
40,000 men and women every day
40,000 men and women every day
Another 40,000 coming every day
That lazy punk. [Timingwise, a direct response to our live comment at the Ouija board that the planchette was moving awfully slow. This recurring wisecracker and Jack Benny impersonator is back. Not his first time.]
Go away. [Also a direct response to our live conversation. An audience member had just said, “Maybe it wants us to go.”]
Bye. [Simultaneously the planchette had shot down to GOODBYE.]
Damn, you messed up. [Okay, now what the hell did I do? Why were they so reticent to speak through the board last night after all of our previous good rapport last month? What did I do differently last night? The only thing I can think of is the addition of pre-show music — chanting Tibetan Buddhist monks invoking Mahakala, the Buddhist version of the Hindu god Shiva, the Lord of Death, who figures prominently in the show. Had this infusion of Buddhism pissed off the otherworldly Judeo-Christian crowd, or at least some of them?]
I’ll forget. [See? This one’s already ready to forgive and forget.]
Won’t you help her? [And this one’s getting the conversation back to the topic at hand: helping little V.]
I miss you. [Aw. I missed you too, sweetie. Good to be back after a month despite that I seem to have pissed a few of you off last night. At least tell me what I did to make you all so angry.]
ME: Can you say goodbye?
Go, please.
ME: Can you say goodbye to us?
No … Goodbye.
Ouch. Well, despite pissing off some of the Synagogue Saints I’m going to at least give a shot at helping out little V. How? By reciting specific passages from the Tibetan Book of the Dead immediately following Sunday’s 3pm show. That revered text explains to us that after death the spirit enters Bardo, a kind of purgatory that serves as a transfer station between lives. It can be terrifying and many unprepared spirits — like children — wind up getting stuck here. In Tibetan Buddhism it’s crucial that a priest or spiritually attuned loved one recite certain prayers for the dying and dead in order to help ensure a decent reincarnation. These recitations or prayers are called The Great Liberation by Hearing. To read all of them aloud would probably take hours but I’m going to read a carefully chosen 10 minutes’ worth while slowly circling the room at 4:30pm Sunday as soon as the show ends. The more who can join in this procession with me the better.
Why not the Lord’s Prayer or the Kaddish or something else from the Judeo-Christian tradition? Simply because I figure they’ve all heard that before what with being in the US (not to mention residing in a synagogue) and clearly it hasn’t worked because they’re still sticking around. So let’s try something different to snap them out of their self-imposed purgatory. I’m talking about — that’s right — an exorcism. Who’s with me?